This House of Love

Reflection, not Resolution

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So often we begin each new year with a laundry list of resolutions: lose weight, gain funds, eat less, exercise more, etc. And it’s a widespread joke that by February these steadfast decisions become nothing but empty promises and proof of failure. 

Ironically enough though, resolution actually means “a firm decision to do or not do something.” It can also mean “the action of solving a problem.” In other words, we start each new trip around the sun ruminating on the previous year’s failures and binding ourselves to start fixing them as of the very first day of the year. No wonder why we all screw up. It’s too much pressure. If it was all that easy to fix our shortcomings don’t you think we’d change without resolving to do so? 

So, here’s my proposal: forget resolutions. Instead, let us reflect. What can we learn from 2017? Think back on the past year, revel in its joys and garner strength from their positivity. Then consider the downfalls, because there are even more lessons to be drawn from those. Let us reflect, learn from our past, and then move on, because it is our responsibility to live in the moment as much as possible. The present is the surest thing we have, and it is painfully fleeting. 


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I Didn’t Choose the Blog Life, the Blog Life Chose Me.

I’ve always dreamt of being a writer. As a child, I devoured book after book, traveling to far off lands and through life-threatening mysteries (from the safety of my bed), while the rest of the late eighties kids played outside from sun up to sun down. I think I was subconsciously studying for my dream career: creating tales that would allow people a taste of escapism, in the form of two hundred-something pages.

However, I always maintained a diary. Sure, most of the entries I scrawled in puffy, pubescent handwriting were laments about one crush or another, but I became used to expressing myself. I found words for my feelings and wrote them down, because I’ve always been a little extra, and so have my thoughts.

Now, fast forward to adulthood, and more specifically my experience with Motherhood. It has been rich with love and fear and light and dark. My head swims daily with thoughts: Am I good enough? Am I alone? Is everyone else as crazy with anxiety about their children as me? Am I fucking up my kids? And conversely, are they fucking me up?

And in these moments, I am so thankful for blogging. I originally kept at it with two intentions: expression and catharsis. But as time went on, I realized that as I exposed my experiences, I found others with similar sentiments. This community of authenticity is liberating. It allows readers to draw strength in a positive, supportive way. And at a time when our country feels so broken, I am even more thankful. 

But, it’s hard. And it’s scary. And when people ask me, “What does it take to be a blogger? How can I become one?” I say, “you just have to do it. You have to write.” But more specifically, you have to be OK with pouring your heart and soul into a piece. You have to embrace being yourself. You have to know the value of being authentic and raw. You have to know that by doing it, you’re allowing others that same liberty. 

Blogging isn’t about selling a product or an idea. It’s about expressing yourself and finding common ground. In this day and age, that is becoming increasingly important. Bloggers and truth tellers alike are at the forefront of important social movements. If you feel that impulse, that need to express yourself, or an itching to express feelings you have trouble verbalizing, nothing should hold you back. Don’t fear failure. Fear absorbing your feelings and not expressing them. Write, and post, even if it’s kept private.

Five years in and I’m still getting used to the idea that I’m creating a writing career in a drastically different arena than I first imagined. And each day I write, I’m allowing pieces of myself out into the world, not some fictional tale I made up. But, it’s become clear that I didn’t choose the blog life. The blog life chose me.


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Three Things I Wish I Knew Before Attending BlogHer16

About five days before BlogHer16, I stumbled onto a post for the convention for the first time. I know, I’m not sure where I was living before that (perhaps under a rock?), but it was going to be on my home turf in just over 120 hours, and I knew in my heart I had to get myself there.

I did the best I could to prepare. I read an article or two, but with the very little time I had all I could do was print a rushed business card at a local office supply store and pray for the best.

Fast forward a year, and considering everything I know now (based on my attendance as well as my prep for BlogHer17), I’ve created a list of:

Three Things I Wish I Knew Before Attending BlogHer16.

1) The package you present yourself in is much less important than the contents inside. Let me explain: those several days I had to “prep” myself (i.e. get my nails done, shop for a cute outfit or two), I spent completely frantic. I thought – gosh, if I don’t seem up on the fashion trends, will I be less desirable to the companies looking for collaborations? Will they be uninterested if they see the roots on my scalp and the milk stains through my shirt?

IMG_8487What I found, was simply this: it’s easy to judge a book by its cover, but most people attending BlogHer are interested in bettering themselves and learning from others. It’s a collaboration of minds, so many of them great! And sure, it’s nice to primp and prep, to style yourself & take care, but your content (pun intended) is so much more important.

2) Sometimes things don’t align perfectly, and that shouldn’t keep you from having the best time possible. Because I was local, and my attendance at BlogHer16 was so last minute, I had no  way of lining up childcare for my little guy (who was 6 months at the time). He had just had his immunizations, but I hadn’t yet taken him to major events. So, I was reticent to hage him tag along, and even reconsidered my attendance because I’d have to drag him with me.

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In the end, I rallied, packed a massive diaper bag, and braved the LA traffic at rush hour to attend. He was perfect. The Expo was a lot of fun for both of us – there were so many interactive booths for children and adults alike – we were in Heaven. I thought he would cramp my style, but I ended up probably making even more connections because of his cute, little face. The only time things got difficult was when I  had to breastfeed during a panel, but still – no more difficult than breastfeeding in public ever is.

I understand the logistics and anxieties that come with travel and attendance. I’ve spent hours of planning this year to attend BlogHer17 in Orlando with my family of four (I know, I’m crazy). It’s hard not to have a great deal of expectations, but the hurdles that present themselves during travel and conventions are just that – meant to be leapt over. 😉

3) Put yourself out there. The only way to get the most from this convention is to be yourself. Show everyone who you are, what you represent, what matters most to you, and people will notice. That’s what all of us bloggers have come here for anyway – to make connections and be inspired by our peers. Be that inspiring you that drives you to blog, and let us see it, too!

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Also, I mean it literally – put yourself out there. There are TONS of raffles, contests, and challenges. Join as many as possible. I think I won two out of four I entered – imagine if I had entered ALL of the ones I wanted to!

Another thing – put yourself out there on social media, if you feel so inclined. Sometimes, businesses are watching. Other times, attendees are. Most of us are because we are just as nervous or excited as you. Let us know so we’re not alone! You’ll never know – you may make a good friend to stroll the halls with!

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Self-Publishing success Panel

…. Have so much fun everyone! And don’t forget to say hello 😉

 

 

 


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An Ode to Trader Joe’s Watermelon-Cucumber Juice

I’m a foodie to the nth degree, and when I find a new product I fall in love with – especially from super affordable Trader Joe’s – I want to shout it from the rooftops!

Instead, to avoid my neighbors trying to commit me, I hit up a Facebook group made for uber loyal TJ’s Moms like me. I posted about the juice that I had found and spontaneously mixed with some rosé on a hard day of Momming. The response was tremendous! People from all over the country chimed in about their favorite ways to use this insanely delicious nectar.

So, I drew some inspiration from my fellow TJ fanatics. I am dedicating a post to the three most delicious Watermelon Cucumber juice recipes I could come up with based on the group members’ awesome ideas. We’ve got a delicious drink, a fresh appetizer (yes, an app!), and a perfect summer-time dessert. Thanks again for the inspiration, ladies, and be sure to follow along for more!

 

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Super Summer Spritzer  – The perfect drink to serve at a summer BBQ!

  • 2 cups chardonnay of your choice
  • 2 cups of rose of your choice
  • 2 cups TJ’s Watermelon Cucumber Juice*
  • 1 cup lime flavored sparkling water
  • juice yielded from half a lime
  • chopped watermelon
  • 1 cup frozen blueberries

Mix non-carbonated liquid ingredients well then stir in sparkling water. Layer fruit and ice in glasses prepared to serve, then pour in liquid. Do not muddle. Serve immediately and enjoy!

*If you prefer a sweeter drink, add more juice! Also, if you prefer different wines, a prosecco would work lovely. Moscato (or those that are inherently sweeter) may make the drink too sweet… unless you don’t believe in such a thing!

 

 

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Sweet ‘n’ Spicy Summer Gazpacho – The perfect sweet, savory, and spicy kickstart to any meal!

Topped with a delicious basil oil:

  • 1/2 cup packed fresh basil leaves
  • 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil
  • Kosher salt
  • Freshly ground black pepper

Blend ingredients and set aside – don’t forget! This stuff makes the dish!

Gazpacho Ingredients:

  • 1 1/2 pounds coarsely chopped cored tomatoes
  • 1 pound coarsely chopped seedless watermelon
  • 3 cups large-dice crustless day-old sourdough
  • 1 1/2 cup TJ’s Watermelon & Cucumber juice
  • 1/4 cup coarsely chopped fresh basil leaves
  • 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
  • 1/4 medium red onion, coarsely chopped
  • 3 medium garlic cloves, coarsely chopped
  • 2 tablespoons sherry vinegar
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt, and more as needed
  • 1/2 teaspoon cumin
  • 1/4 teaspoon TJ’s Chili Lime Seasoning

Mix ingredients and allow them to sit for about fifteen minutes. Then, toss them in a blender incrementally until desired consistency. Top with basil oil. Serve cold!*

*Recommended serving: rim bowl with Trader Joe’s chili lime seasoning to ensure everyone will be licking their bowls clean!

 

 

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Homemade Watermelon Jell-O – Incredibly simple, yet very elegant*

  • 1 3/4 cups Watermelon Cucumber Juice, divided into two containers (1/4 cup and 1 1/2 cups)
  • 1/4 cup boiled water
  • 1 tablespoon unflavored gelatin
  • Chunks of diced watermelon (optional)

*Serving suggestion includes basil leaves and whipped cream

(“Blooming” directions taken from Detoxinista.com)

To begin, you’ll want to “bloom” the gelatin in a bit of cool or room-temperature fruit juice, to ensure a smooth and even end result. In a medium mixing bowl, sprinkle the tablespoon of gelatin over 1/4 cup of the fruit juice and whisk well until the mixture starts to thicken.

Once the mixture is nice and thick, pour the 1/4 cup of hot (just boiled) water over it, and whisk well to dissolve evenly. When the mixture is smooth, add in the remaining 1 1/2 cups of fruit juice, and mix well to combine.

Pour the mixture into small, single serving containers and place in the fridge to set for at least 2 hours. Top with two basil leaves and whipped cream, serve to the most delighted eaters ever!